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1 June, 2000 12:00 am

Trenton, NJ – So-Called “Hip-Hop fan”, Raymond Catz of Trenton, New Jersey, doesn’t even know who Orb The Living Vortex is. This was discovered Friday, when Catz was discussing who he thought the dopest emcee was, on an internet discussion board. Catz, who then voted for Redman, was then attacked by the entire population of [cont.]

24 May, 2000 12:00 am

Beverly Hills, CA – Superstar rap producer, Dr. Dre, has taken the next step in his lawsuit against Napster, by compiling a list of users who are illegally trading his music using the Napster software. It is reported that Dre is also using the software to compile a list of his favorite MP3′s from Korn. [cont.]

24 May, 2000 12:00 am

Beverly Hills, CA – Dr. Dre had a pretty frustrating Friday last week, as jokers across the United States recognized the national holiday, “Fuck With Dre Day”. “It happens every year, but these guys get me every time,” said Dre. “I was eating breakfast that morning, when door bell rang. I ran outside to see [cont.]

24 May, 2000 12:00 am

OHIO – In an attempt to keep inner-city youth off the streets and out of trouble, rapper DMX introduced the option of “Ryding”, as a new choice to take, when offered the tempting and dangerous paths of “Skating” or “Dying”. Since the 1980′s, “skating” has been the number one catalyst in turning innocent young teens [cont.]

11 May, 2000 12:00 am

Boise, ID – Local Boise resident, twelve year old Tommy Johnston, discovered proof that supposedly deceased rapper, Tupac Shakur, has in fact faked his death, and still lives, under an assumed name in an undisclosed location. The pre-pubescent genius discovered this fact during a purchase on Ebay, the internet’s largest online auction house. Apparently, the [cont.]

8 May, 2000 12:00 am

Tacoma, WA – Local Washington resident, Brad Green, also known as DJ Skillator, was disappointed to find out that his performance on the turntables had not improved at all, after purchasing an entire DJ-related wardrobe, consisting of several t-shirts from Tribal, plus various hats and jackets from Extra Strength. “I’ve been DJing for like two [cont.]

21 April, 2000 12:00 am

Oakland, CA – Digital Underground frontman, Shock G, made a shocking revelation today in an interview with MTV news. Apparently, the rapper has been elusively masquerading as fellow D.U. rapper, Humpty Hump, for more than ten years. “Um, yeah….. I thought you knew,” Shock told MTV, “It’s just a cheap pair of Groucho glasses, a [cont.]

12 March, 2000 12:00 am

WALL STREET – After an exhausting year, financial experts estimate that almost 17.2 billion dollars was frivolously tossed around in rap videos in 1999. This was surprisingly double the amount of what was thrown around by these ultra rich, care-free rappers in 1998. The year’s most expensive video was Raekwon’s “Live From New York”, which [cont.]

12 March, 2000 12:00 am

Brooklyn, NY – As fans eagerly approach the release date of Foxy Brown’s upcoming release “Chyna Doll”, the status of her uniform remains the same, as she is still not naked. While the amount of press she is getting for the upcoming release is astronomical, the fact remains unchanged. Fans were, once again, disappointed last [cont.]

11 March, 2000 12:00 am

Beverly Hills, CA – Actor / singer Joey Lawrence was like “Whoa” this afternoon, after apparently hearing that Blossom’s best friend, Six, has like a huge crush on him. Word has it that Lawrence was snooping in Blossom’s room, when he heard their voices coming from the other room, and quickly retreated to the closet. [cont.]

2 January, 2000 12:00 am

RENO, NV – While the Y2K bug turned out to be a hoax, it was discovered shortly after midnight on New Year’s Day that the Technic 1200 turntable is not “Will2K” compliant. Mix Master P of Club Millenium first discovered the bug. Merry partygoers had their festivities interrupted when the washed-up DJ attempted to mix [cont.]

1 January, 2000 12:00 am

New York, NY – While many were expecting computer systems to fail, terrorists to attack, or even the Second Coming Of Christ, the only shock of New Year’s 2000 was the spontaneous combustion of superstar entertainer Busta Rhymes. Apparently, the rapper was in a hotel room in New York City, just before the ball dropped [cont.]

7 October, 1999 12:00 am

Sacramento, CA – Area resident Jimmy Martinez came to the conclusion that fucking Sean “Puffy” Combs is fucking singer / actress Jennifer Lopez. Apparently, Martinez came to this realization on Thursday afternoon, while sitting on his couch watching MTV news. “Yo, it wasn’t instantaneous. I heard they were going out, and I was like, ‘whatever.’ [cont.]

28 September, 1999 12:00 am

Richmond, VA – A startling discovery was made last week by Reverend Carlton Morris of Our Lady Of Richmond Church in Virginia. The Reverend said he found hidden devil messages when he put a copy of Redman’s “I’ll Be That” on his phonograph player, putting the needle on the record itself, and while in the [cont.]

20 September, 1999 12:00 am

New York, NY – Many of the nations top emcees came together this weekend, putting aside all differences, banding together for one common cause, a song to further the murder of New York City mayor, Rudy Guliani. Among the artists to contribute to the record, entitled “We Shot Rudy”, are Pharoahe Monch, Pacewon, M.O.P., Screwball, [cont.]

30 June, 1999 12:00 am

It was a disturbing and frightful sight last Friday night, when Police arrived at the scene of the gruesome slaying of Fennius West, on the corner of 4th and Broadway. Found fleeing from the scene were suspects Christopher Ried and Christopher Martin, more commonly known as the rap duo, Kid ‘n Play. Police eventually caught [cont.]

30 March, 1999 12:00 am

New York, NY – Trick Daddy Dollars was the night’s big winner at the Online Hip-Hop Awards on Tuesday, taking home five awards, including “Online Hip-Hop Award of the Year” for his innovative and cutting edge website,, for which his latest album is named after. Among the awards won by Trick Daddy included “Website [cont.]

12 December, 1998 12:00 am

LOUISVILLE, KT – It was a big day at Louisville’s Garden Square Mall on Saturday. Literally thousands of teenage girls rushed to see the newest heartthrob in entertainment, Jeru The Damaja. Jeru arrived at the mall at 12 P.M. and his performance was held inside Contempo, which was filled beyond capacity with many of his [cont.]

1 January, 1997 6:00 pm

Bronx, NY – In an attempt to reach out to the urban community, McDonald’s latest television commercial has ruined the potential careers of five aspiring Bronx rappers, in less time than it takes to get a Big Mac Value Meal at the Drive-Thru. The commercial, which features five street kids rapping in a circle about [cont.]

1 January, 1997 12:00 am

Hip-Hop beat producer The Alchemist has found himself in yet another predicament of accidentally giving the same beat to two different artists. This time, Al has sold the same beat to two hip-hop acts – Snap and Chill Rob G. Both acts have recorded their vocals over the beat, somehow coming up with two very [cont.]

  Mixtape D.L.
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